ME

I DO IT AGAIN.. why?? why now.. why can't i wait for few more month?? don't i enjoying my life for the last few month.. why i have to spoil it?? i have repeatly told myself not to fall into the same problem again.. i have been avoiding it for so long.. why can't i wait!! now is not the best time for this... here i am.. stupid me!!

what do you do when you are upset?? some people might drunk themself with booze.. some eat ferociously.. or gyming maybe.. or crying their heart out..

as for me.. i smoke!! I smoke untill my lung can't take it anymore.. i know it.. i have a weak lung and bad throat.. my throat have been hurt before.. don't i remember my throat have been badly hurt as recent as two years ago.. i have lost my voice for few days.. and for once.. i almost lost my life because of breathing problem..

soo.. why do i do it again..?? because this is me.. when i upset.. only smoking can release my tension.. without it.. i will be crazy.. i know i am not a happy man.. the fact is.. i am very very moody person.. i can turn from cheerful to sad in just a split second... and because of this.. i need to choose something to control myself.. that is smoke!!

sometimes.. i just think.. isn't it a good idea if i could just sleep and never wake up again.. i have no reason to life.. my life have no meaning at all.. i felt so lonely..

my friend told me blogging can help to calm yourself.. i hope this is true..

To a fren who asked me how to win a gal's heart, here's a good answer 4 u......

Most guys let their feelings blind them as soon as they meet a hot chick. They start fantasizing about spending the night or even building a future with the "girl of their dream", when the girl is clearing showing absolutely NO interest in them. In some cases, the girl doesn't even NOTICE the guy. Here's the bottom line:
SHE HAS TO LIKE YOU FIRST BEFORE YOU CAN START ANYTHING WITH HER!!When it comes to dating, women are the choosers. Men pick, but women choose.
If she likes your style or looks, she will let you approach her.
If she likes your approach, she will let you talk.
If she likes the conversation, she will give you the phone number.
If she likes the first date, she will give you a second date.
If she likes you holding her hand, she will let you kiss her.
If she likes your French kiss, she will let you??

GET IT?

Most guys make the mistake of projecting their own attraction onto the girl. They think: "I think she is the most wonderful person in the world, so she must feel the same way about me!"

Uh-huh. Wrong!!
She doesn't care about how much you love her, she only cares about how much SHE likes you!
Think about it. If a fat chick with a black beard tells you she loves you, are you going to marry her on the spot? No way! The same thing is true for women. If a girl does not like you, then you're just like the fat chick with a beard. No matter how hard you try, she's not going to marry you because she is not attracted to you at all.

On the other hand, if you have a girl who loves you with all her heart, then she will try her best to make you feel happy. There are NO limits to what a girl would do for a man she loves. She could be working a 60-hour job, but she's still going to find time to go out with you if she likes you enough.

Every once in awhile, you hear about a "bad boy" abusing his wife or girlfriend. The guy hits and abuses the poor girl every day, but when the guy gets arrested the girl still stands up for him in court and even waits for him to get out of jail.

Why?

Because the girl is super-attracted to him! See what I mean when I say it's not how much you like the girl, but how much the girl likes you!!

LISTEN, IF SHE DOESN’T LIKE YOU, SHE WON'T CHANGE HER MIND NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU TRY TO CHASE HER.

GO ahead. Send her flowers. Buy her gifts. Ask her out. She may be flattered. But let me tell you now.. you AREN'T going to win her heart.
You're just going to be "used" as a "friend" she takes out when she feel bored and need company. You will NEVER get to spend your life with the girl of your dream.
But there IS a way around this. Instead of "chasing" women like most guys do, try to ATTRACT THEM instead. GET IT!!
GOOD LUCK!!